Step 4
We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
The first time I worked this step was in therapy four years ago. I had to write down a list of all my acting out behaviors. It was shocking to see all the addictions, compulsions and perversions in writing. Because much of my life had been lived in a daze of fantasy and denial; it was like reading about someone else.
One thing we sometimes overlook in working this step is it isn't only the weaknesses that we need to inventory. We must also look at our strengths to stay in balance. Often times we focus so much on the bad things we have done that it keeps us feeling beat down. By evaluating the good things about our life, the potential for greatness that God has put in us; we will keep moving forward to recovery.
Step 4 is the beginning of the growth steps. By examining our past behavior good and bad we work towards understanding ourselves. Being totally honest is vital to the self-discovery that will provide a foundation of our recovery. Only rigorous honesty will remove the obstacles that have prevented us from truthfully acknowledging our deepest feelings about life and thus really knowing ourselves.
Prayerfully take a day with pen and paper in hand, ask God to reveal His truth about you to you. Remember God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind. With strength given by the Holy Spirit we can push through the denial, past resentments, and the fear of acknowledging who and what we have been, to become whole in Jesus Christ.
Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord. -- Lamentations 3:40
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