put on a sheepskin bend over and bleat like a sheep

Fangs Rule: A Girls Guide to Being a Vampire

I expect you may have guessed that I am a little mixed when it come to nationally, I do infact have American nationality but do not always live there …how? ….not sure quite how………  er……….. well it seamed easy at the time……….

You just have both your parents killed when still a child and suddenly you are in America………

The process of citizenship? ……….er…….Yes I do remember ……well the important stuff anyway……….

FLUSH TOILETS that you can even sit down on !!!!

CHOCOLATE which I am now addicted to .

MANGA I remember I was given some Manga comics in Japanese and thinking why do white people think I can read Japanese ……….

It is nice to know you have citizenship to a country that has bigger guns than others ……and freedom to speak ……………… with my last blog people said to me you cant say that!..................... er…………. Yes I can …..er…….infact I just did…silly comment.

Others ask do I hate religions ……………… heck no …………. I love them as they are so funny I sometimes wonder if my undies will ever dry.

Freedom of speech is fun in so long as you remember the golden rule ……….. never use the “N” WORD and do not say the Jew are taking over the world …………. You let Congress point that out by the way they applaud Israel’s leader when he says he is happy to have peace as long as it can still own Palestine. 

Repeat after me ………………. the Jews are not taking over the world…………. ………………. the Jews are not taking over the world…………………. the Jews are not taking over the world…………………. the Jews are not taking over the world…………………. the Jews are not taking over the world…

Right now we sorted that out I think I am safe with my blog casts.

Still no religious war over my blogs as yet ………. Ho well must think of a new way to get some publicity.

……………………………………… My Vampire Love Life...................

Being a vampire it is quite normal to leap out at a guy at night in leather underwear and carrying a whip ……………………… it’s a vampire thing …ok?

Now I really very innocent when it comes to all your strange human perversions ………… true I sometime eat wearing a black plastic bag ….but that is not odd !!! ………..it is not my fault you human spurt your blood in all directions with just the smallest of bites …………………

I still can’t get over the idea of Furries and the modern fetish of dressing up as animals to make love.

Now knowing my nice loveable vampire character from my blogs ……Just think of what would happen if a boyfriend of mine ever asked me to put on a sheepskin bend over and bleat like a sheep !!!! while he drops his pants to get in tuned with his animal nature.

Well you know how it is, I am a little slow what with being a girl and all, so I would ask him to demonstrate to my how it is done…………. You do know what they say about a pen being mightier than the sword …………..don’t you?

Well it is so much how you think of using something which is small but hard and pointed ……….. bleat like a sheep er? …………..   I wonder what sort of operation a guy would need to remove a pen from his rectum ……….?

Big beds containing naked vampires in old castles

Naked vampires

OK lets get this clear it is only the turned female vampires (ex-humans and now undead) Hollywood style that have perfect boobs and like to go around wearing a thin see-through nightdress with no panties.

Normal full bloods like me……. well we like to wear clothing and with how cold the caves are thick clothing!

Which could only be deemed see-through if you have x-ray vision!  

So the idea of beds containing naked vampires in old castles is only for the movies, er.......... they are like very cold in winter! I have checked with my family and the only vampire I know that wears a night shirt for sleeping is my Uncle, his sister my Aunt wears more in bed than see does during the day including a layer of cats which join her in bed!

My boyfriend Max says he only wears a smile in bed and I can come and check anytime !

But his sister my bestie friend Ice says he wears a smelly old Tee and shorts which their Mom has threatened to burn if he forgets to put out to wash again.

She, that is Ice and not her Mom wears a top and shorts in bed, myself if anyone is interested I wear PJs and in winter flannelette ones and also keep my underwear on as my bedroom is cold, unless Bambi my maid sleeps with me, then we can cuddy up together.

Look ! just because you sleep with a girl does not make you a leasbian, sometimes it just means the central heating needs fixing!

Ho yes I do tell Max (boyfriend) that I always sleep in the nude ……. hehehe .....as it will give him something to dream about !!!!

Just had a lovly book review ....just click on the video clip below:

See more book details here :  http://www.fangsrule.com/buy.htm